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This post is dedicated to my Muslim sisters who are single.
Sisters who are fat. Sisters who are too skinny. Sisters who are dark. Sisters who are too tall. Sisters who are too short. Sisters who have passed the ‘prime age’ to get married.
Sisters who have given up hope. Sisters who are still hopeful. Sisters with taits that you cannot change.

Your physical appearance has nothing to do with finding a husband. Your age has nothing to do with it too.

First, be grateful. Be full of shukr for having a life. For having health. For having many blessings that others simply don’t.

Secondly, do istighfaar. Plenty of it. If you ever complained about your physical appearance. Allaah created you and He is the best of creators. Perhaps making you this way was what was best for you. Perhaps it was to protect you from other harm and trials. This acceptance will allow you to be happy with yourself. A prince charming will not make you happy overnight. Disney is not real. You are. Your emotions are. Your situation is. Accept it with a full heart.

Thirdly, ignore the haters. It could be your family, your relatives, random strangers. Ignore their comments and do not take them personally. If they say something negative, turn it into positive. The fault is in them, not in you.

For example, If they call you too dark, (this is what most women struggle with, I am aware!) say to yourself my skin is beautiful. I am just roasted. Or I love chocolate so much it shows. Being dark is not a bad trait! Don’t restrict yourself from wearing clothes that someone once said makes you look darker! Wear them and see for yourself.

Narrated Aisha, Ummul Mu’minin: I said to the Prophet SalAllaahu alayhi wasallam: It is enough for you in Safiyyah that she is such and such (the other version than Musaddad’s has:) meaning that she was short-statured.
He replied; You have said a word which would change the sea if it were mixed in it.
Sunan Abu Dawud: Book 41, Number 4857

Someone who says something negative about your physical appearance, Islamically has commited a sin. They have said something so ugly and something so polluted that a huge sea will change from something beautiful to horrific.
So throw it on people the next time they call you by any names. As Muslims, we are better than this mindset.
May Allaah guide us all and whole.

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My Princess… or not

A lot of people call my daughter “my princess”.

I strongly disagree with this title for her and I stop them from calling her that. I have seen way too many girls growing up, including myself, feeling entitled. I have also noticed a trend in the girls when they are about to get married or are married, mistreating their parents, and their husbands, being disrepectful for not having their demands and WANTS met, and failing in their marriages because no one helped them detox from the fairy tales they grew up watching and constantly hearing themselves being called a princess.

Please don’t call my daughter a princess. Alhamdulillaah my family has realized this and stopped. She is not a princess. I am not going to treat her like one and in shaa Allaah she will not have the Disney princesses or any other similar horrible role models despite their known limited good qualities. If a child constantly hears themselves being called a princess, they are eventually going to look it up (Just think about how often have you tried researching the meaning of your name?) :)
and they will want to find out what or who a princess is. And then they will want to dress like one, talk like one and act like one. And what’s out there is pretty but not good.

Once you detox from this environment, you will surely see the many flaws the Disney princesses have contributed to your life.

– being rude when corrected
– stomping your feet when angry
– having low self esteem when you don’t look pretty or when no one calls you pretty
– feeling hurt when someone says NO to you (like seriously!)
– not saying “no” enough and compromising with what you want to do vs what others want you to do.

Princess Tantrums

I can add more to this list, but I want you to figure it out and rethink how much more growing up with these characters have modeled your personality.

My daughter is not my princess. Her and her dad are the coolness of my eyes. She is a Muslimah in making. I make du’aa for her to be from the muttaqeen and Saliheen. I am going to raise her with the fear of accountability from my Lord and instill the same consciousness in her so she doesn’t speak, act or behave believing she is the centre of attention. Titles go a long way and that’s why naming your children with good meanings is from the sunnah.

I call her with many other titles which I hope will have a more positive effect on her in shaa Allaah. This is also from the sunnah to give names to people they like to hear.
P.s. she is also not my monkey.

And help and success is only from Allaah.

We often learn about the importance of reciting Qur’aan with properly pronounced letters as changing one letter may change the meaning of the word.

However, completing your vowels (harakah) is as important when it comes to preserving the word.

For e.g. the word حمر
If you read it as Humr (no vowel on م) it means to redden, or to turn red.
If you read it as Humar (with fatHah on م), it means asphalt
If you read it as Humur (with dhammah on م), it means donkeys!

The letters or their orders did not change at all in this word. The only thing changed was how we read the middle letter.

It gets more interesting when you change either one of the harakah of a three-lettered verb and you can come up with many variation in meanings and even create sentences!

For e.g. the word حَمِرَ. Any guesses what it means?
Feel free to share similar examples with vowels

Birds and communication

I really wonder how birds communicate with each other. One bird will find something and somehow the rest of them get a signal and they all come within seconds to join their friend.

SubHaanAllaah, such amazing communication skills. It probably goes like this:

Bird 1 (the scout): I see some water down there. I am going to go check it out.
Bird 1 comes to the water, sees no danger, calls them all over (HOW?!!) and they all come within seconds.
There is so much trust in their relationship.

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Real Oppression

Bismillaah

Islam is a blessing and you can see it practice by those who are being oppressed and killed due to their Islam. I look at the Muslims in the Muslim lands and they amaze me.

WAllaahi they are oppressed physically, but we Muslims in the West are oppressed spiritually.
To the Muslims living in the West, when have you seen Islam as a blessing and not a burden?

How many sisters complain, “I can’t wear Hijaab because I won’t find a good job.”
You are oppressed by your nafs.

How many youth don’t pray 5 times a day because they don’t want to be judged by their friends.
You are oppressed by your nafs.

How many parents don’t wake up their children for Fajr or teach them about Islam because they think it’s not important.
You are oppressed by your nafs.

How many brothers don’t attend the salah in the Masjid or seek halal options for work.
You are oppressed by your nafs.

Can you not see what makes the Muslims so strong? Do you not desire to be like them?
Learning the deen is so convenient in our times. You can even obtain a B.A. in Islamic Sciences for free!

Stop being oppressed by your nafs my dear brothers and sisters and learn about deen.
Here are some resources to get you started.

Learn Tajweed and how to recite Qur’aan:
http://www.jazriyyah.com

Tafseer of the whole Qur’aan and other courses (Jan 2015):
http://alhudainstitute.ca/

Learn Arabic:
http://www.bayyinah.com

B.A. in Islamic Sciences:
http://www.islamiconlineuniversity.com/

May Allaah make the path of seeking knowledge accessible to you. 

Du’a of Traveling

Bismillaah

I recently taught this du’aa to my students while teaching the Adab of Traveling. It is such a beautiful du’aa and very easy to memorize if you memorize it in chunks. My students finished memorizing it in 3 classes, walHumdulillaah.

اللَّهُ أَكْبَرُ، اللَّهُ أَكْبَرُ، اللَّهُ أَكْبَرُ

سُبْحَانَ الذِي سَخَّرَ لَنَا هَذَا وَمَا كُنَّا لَهُ مُقْرِنِينَ وَإِنَّا إِلَى رَبِّنَا لَمُنْقَلِبُونَ

اللَّهُمَّ إِنَّا نَسْأَلُكَ فِي سَفَرِنَا هَذَا الْبِرَّ وَالتَّقْوَى، وَمِنَ الْعَمَلِ مَا تَرْضَى، اللَّهُمَّ هَوِّنْ عَلَيْنَا سَفَرَنَا هَذَا، وَاطْوِ عَنَّا بُعْدَهُ، اللَّهُمَّ أَنْتَ الصَّاحِبُ فِي السَّفَرِ، وَالْخَلِيفَةُ فِي الأَهْلِ، اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ وَعَثَاءِ السَّفَرِ وَكَآبَةِ الْمَنْظَرِ وَسُوءِ الْمُنْقَلَبِ فِي الْمَالِ وَالأَهْلِ،

وَإِذَا رَجَعَ قَالَهُنَّ وَزَادَ <<آيِبُونَ تَائِبُونَ عَابِدُونَ لِرَبِّنَا حَامِدُونَ» رواه مسلم

 “Allah is the greatest, Allah is the greatest, Allah is the greatest,
How perfect He is, The One Who has placed this (transport) at our service, and we ourselves would not have been capable of that, and to our Lord is our final destiny.
O Allah, we ask You for birr (righteousness) and taqwa (God-conscious) in this journey of ours, and we ask You for deeds which please You. O Allah, facilitate our journey and let us cover it’s distance quickly. O Allah, You are The Companion on the journey and The Successor over the family, O Allah, I take refuge with You from the difficulties of travel, from having a change of hearts and being in a bad predicament, and I take refuge in You from an ill fated outcome with wealth and family.”
Upon returning the same supplication is recited with the following addition (We return, repent, worship and praise our Lord.)

 

You can also hear the audio and transliteration on this page

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